Goalden Girls Podcast Episode #49 - Breaking the silence on grief and life with Teresa from La Lupa Via

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Grief, loss, trauma - we all experience it in life. In fact, it’s often joked that nothing is certain - except death and taxes. 

And yet as a culture and society, there is VERY little support and awareness about grief and loss. 

For the big stuff, we tend to come together pretty well - for the death of someone or in major tragedies. 

But even then - there’s a lot of guilt I know people feel if they grieve for “too long”. Or don’t grieve “the right way.” 

And let’s be real… there’s a lot of grief that gets invalidated and dishonoured.

The impact this has is very profound and damaging. In fact, SO much of the work I do as a coach is just hearing people - and allowing people to feel HEARD, like they matter and validating their experience - because the truth is that most of the time, the world tells us we should be doing something different, we should or shouldn’t feel a certain way. 

Today, I have a very special guest to talk with us all even DEEPER on this topic of grief and loss.

Teresa Campbell of La Lupa Via is a full spectrum doula which means she witnesses Bereavement, Loss, and Birth.

She is here to create a revolution and allow people to honour their grief. 

I am not an expert in grief - just a human, and a coach who works with incredible women…but Teresa has expertise and over 20 years experience. 

And also - we’re not counsellors, therapists, psychologists or doctors - we’re not trained in mental health in terms of depression, suicide, anxiety, or addiction. Please know what we are sharing is meant to provide information and ideas…and is a conversation between two women. If you’re looking for more help and support, please get it. This is not meant to replace counselling, therapy or medical professionals. And if you listen until the end, Teresa also has a special gift for all our listeners to help you with your journey as well.

This episode is so important for many reasons:

  • Grief is a very real, very human experience we all go through - and yet it’s still quite taboo.

  • There’s a grief hierarchy - we often find ourselves comparing our grief to others… and then shaming ourselves for feeling grief when our situation “Isn’t as bad as someone else’s.”

  • We don’t know how to honour our grief.

  • We judge ourselves and others for grieving - grieving the wrong way, too fast, too slow…or whatever other judgements we make.

Now, more than ever, there is so much collective grief - about what we’ve lost, about injustices, even anticipatory grief about what is coming, and that’s why this episode - and Teresa’s work - is so incredibly important. 

I want to give you a heads up on this - the audio in this recording is a bit muffled and there’s a background sound that we were unable to get rid of in the editing process. 

We’re working hard to make sure this doesn’t happen again….but I didn’t even consider not releasing this episode or re-recording BECAUSE the message in it is so important. The words of wisdom from Teresa are beautiful and pure and in need of being shared. 

So I ask for your grace and compassion as you listen in. I recognize the quality isn’t what we normally strive for but the message and what you will learn from it is WELL worth your time, and your ability to hear through the background noise. 

In today’s episode, you’re going to hear:

  • Why what our society has taught us about grief is incomplete and in a lot of cases, wrong.

  • What the effects are of how we’re currently “processing” grief.

  • How we can move through our grief journey in a healthy and loving way.

  • Some ideas on what we should - and perhaps shouldn’t - do for ourselves and others.

  • You’ll hear some practices and tools of support for yourself - and others.

  • And how you can transition into more compassion and expansion with your grief.

Whether your grief is fresh, or decades old, whether you’re grieving the loss of your favourite restaurant, your job, a child, a marriage, a partner, parent, career, identity, expectation, or anything in-between, this is for you. 

In the words of Teresa: your grief is valid. Your grief matters. With this episode, we honour you and your grief with love. We hope it supports you on your grief journey.

Here are the juicy bits you can look forward to:

  • How Teresa came into this line of work. (7:55)

  • What is grief? (13:10)

  • Why what we’ve been taught about grief is all wrong. (15:00)

  • What the ripple effect is when we hold onto grief. (32:00)

  • How rage fits into the grief process. (37:45)

  • How we can move through our grief journey in a healthy way. (43:55)

  • How to balance choosing joy and still honouring our grief. (53:20)

  • How to support others who are grieving. (1:08:00)

  • The thing we all need when it comes to grief. (1:21:45)

  • What the difference is between anticipatory grief and anxiety over something in the future? (1:14:00)

  • What it looks like working with Teresa. (1:31:30)

  • The revolution that Teresa is working towards. (1:38:30)

Watch the Video for Compassion in Action Tips

 

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Resources:

Quotes to Share:

Download and share the quotes you loved on your social and inspire those around you:

 
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“In this society we are intensely grief phobic.” - Teresa Campbell

“Our experience matters and our grief matters.” - Teresa Campbell

“I care so much about the ways in which people are suffering.” - Teresa Campbell

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Thank you so much for listening.

xo,

Lisa


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